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  • lotusvillage


For a long time, I struggled to understand what it meant to wear a mask... I didn't see the full extent of what lay behind it. And most importantly, I identified with the masks. To me, it was who I was, period. Then, I started working on myself and understanding what it was all about...

Do you know what I'm talking about? I'm not talking about Spiderman's mask... No, I'm talking about the social mask of the role(s) we accept most of the time unconsciously. It's a role we take on because we understand that it's what is expected of us. A role that acts as a protective barrier because we've realized that with it, we will suffer less. It's, for example, the mask of the good student, the obedient child, the mask of the friendly colleague, the mask of the model employee, the great buddy, the loudmouth, the mask of the hypocrite or flatterer, the clown's mask... and so on! Everyone wears masks... because behind them, there's the fear of not being accepted, the fear of being judged or rejected. I also have masks, several of which I'm aware of, and others that I probably haven't discovered yet!

An inner journey is a bit like peeling an onion... you remove one layer... and you discover there's another. One of my masks is that of the nice, helpful guy. It doesn't mean that I'm not genuinely nice, far from it. I am. But behind this mask, there's sometimes the need to be loved, to be accepted. The paradox is that I'm also a loudmouth, and I speak my mind with frankness and honesty... but always with kindness and diplomacy. I also have the mask of the strong guy, the joker, the savior (the one who always helps everyone and forgets about himself in the process), the mask of the masochist (the one who stays in a relationship despite demeaning remarks and lack of respect).

Living with our masks is not a lie; it's a survival strategy. We often wear masks to conform to social expectations, pre-established norms, or to please others.

Since our birth, society tells us how to be, how to act, how to think. It doesn't care if we're a fish, a hare, or an elephant! You have to be what the norm dictates. It's the same with family. You must conform to what your upbringing expects of you!

If we grow up with the belief that we're expected to be a fish, then we will take on the mask of a fish and act accordingly (it's a metaphor, you understand!)... even if it means lying to ourselves.

From a very young age, we learn through sensations more than words, "it hurts vs. it feels good." I get scolded, belittled, criticized—it hurts, so I'll adapt to avoid suffering and wear the mask expected of me.

We believe that if we show our true face, we'll be vulnerable and rejected. Therefore, we assume roles that don't necessarily reflect our true identity. We become actors in our own lives, seeking acceptance and love, but at the expense of our authentic happiness. The problem is that these masks can become suffocating and exhausting in the long run.

By concealing our true emotions, aspirations, and vulnerabilities, we eventually drift away from our true essence.

We get lost in the characters we create, and it can lead to a feeling of disconnection from ourselves and others. Therefore, it is essential to find ways to free ourselves from these masks and live in alignment with our inner being...



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